YSunday, May 10, 2009' 11:24 am
oh god ! I just cant wait for this Thursday to arrive . because our last paper will fall on this Thursday . But still , N-level is not over . Maira must keep studying , to achieve better results for N-level and prove to my parents that i dont need their trusts .
Monday , lessons were normal . Well , most of the time we did our own Revision . Every subject teacher gave us 3 exam papers each for practice . Oh gosh (!!!) but of course , i did it for my own good . After school , head to somewhere with Rabia , in the end i went home along . Well , im willing to sacrifice anything from now on . Reached home , get changed and went to MacD alone to study . Im used to studying there already . In the evening met Rabia and went to Tuition . I just wish Tuition was as before when things were suppose to be as it is . Everything change when i told the truth ):
Tuesday , lessons were normal again . This time , teachers started to re-teach Sec3 topics . I just need time for me to digest it in my bloody head . Oh well , im not as smart as afew people i know . After school , i left Rabia with her boyf and other guys and taught them Emaths . I went to Bedok with Kuda for awhile , and yeah we told each other how we feel when some things happened . Reached home early , had my afternoon nap , met Rabia at 6pm and off to Tuition . Im kind of getting the use of rushing to places , and i like it (: Reached home late . I did my last minute Revision for Emaths then off to bed at 2am .
Wednesday , we had Mother Tongue Paper 2 and Emaths Paper 1 on that day . I didn't even study anything for Mother Tongue paper . Hope to fail that paper with flying colours :D Oh well , Maira is ain't good at Malay even though she come from a Malay family . & im proud of it :D After both papers , stayed back in the canteen with usual people - Rabia , Shaz , Adam and Saiful . We studied Physics for tmr's paper . Everyone was seriously engrossed with the Practice papers except for someone . Shaz was superduper restless after an hour and started watching Spartians ? then , everyone started to take a break and join him .We laughed till our sides hurt like hell (: No one can ever replace them in my life .
In the canteen .
At MacD studying with Rabia only.
In the evening , Rabia & I decided not to go tuition but to do our revision for Physics again at MacD. We stayed there till 10pm and went home .
Thursday , we had Physics paper & Geography Elective paper . I swear i didn't study for Geography that much only reading through notes (!!!) Im really afraid that , if i screw this paper , my results wont show ): After the bell rings , Rabia and I went straight home . I changed , and studied with Raudhah at MacD first . Then , met Rabia at the bustop and head to tuition earlier for that day . We planned to study Amaths first , then Science . We reached there at about 5pm ? Head home at 10pm . Slept at 5am ? An hour and a half to go get ready for school .
Friday , had English Paper 2 & Amaths Paper . Both papers was utterly dreadful . Chey ! English paper was do-able but not for Amaths . I skipped 2questions . I didn't get to finish the paper . Well , its over not , we cant do anything about it . After both papers , Rabia & I got no life again , went to lepak at different blocks . First , we ate lunch at Rasa-Rasa Thai with Kuda . Then she went off , we decided to lepak near my block where all the Matreps will be . When we got there , they were gone , left only the ITE people . Then , walked to MacD and camwhored (: We seriously got no life when weekends are coming . Head home at 3pm .
In the evening , met Rabia again and coincidently , we wore yellow (!!) We didn't even plan at all . Actually , i decided to wear my Volcom shit but change of mind . We saw the same people under the same fucking block everyday . Well , not her but me because i kept passing the same block to get home . Tuition was alright , i guess . Reached home at 10.30pm . First step into the house , my dad slapped me on my right cheek . I cant remember what i do wrong . I burst into tears on the spot . I couldn't take it anymore . Im complete useless in this family then why i must have the heart to study do hard just to impress them . I shouldn't have the mindset of studying so had in the first place . I should just do it for myself , my own good , my future , my dream .
Saturday , which was yesterday , i spent the whole afternoon at home watching tevee . I woke up almost noon . I was so emotional when i started to watch hindi movies . It really touched me deep . In the evening , got changed and visit our neighbour's place for idk what . Then , went to eat at Rasa-Rasa Thai . I know i cried alot at night . I was thinking so much about you . But i know that i still love you ): One more thing , i want you to take care of yourself when im not there with you kay ?
At midnight .
Today , woke up early , my lil brother woke me up . I still my sleep . Idk what i'll do today , I wish i dont have to waste my time at Religious class because its seriously tires me out . I feel like quitting but i know my parents wouldn't let me as it is important for our life . Oh well )':
I feel like calling a friend tonight , and talk things out with that friend . I wanna let out all my feelings/problems im having now to let myself feel not hurt anymore . Anyone please ?
