YSunday, May 03, 2009' 11:22 am
I must forget about him , everything that involves him , i must erase/delete/burn/throw away . Its the best for me . Its a step for me to move on but i dont think i can . But life has still to go on . I know i cant recover in a split second but it will be soon . I wouldn't care if it will take days, weeks, months or even years to move on but its something we all humans have to do . In relationships , at a moment we love each other , the next moment you know that everything's gonna be not good . Why still continue ? It will just make everything harder and difficult to say . It will make the things we do muchmuchmuch complicated and hard to get things through . Its like forcing a pin into a hard concrete steel wall , which yknow that the pin will never go through the wall . All this while , when you said you're alright , which means you're not right ? When you said you wouldn't do stupid things , you've already do it right ? When you've said you're not sick , you're actually really really sick right ? I know everything from the tone of your voice , from the way you text/chat me , i know everything . I just dont want you to know that i know . I know its hard for you to tell the truth to me , but give a chance to let you . I know i will never make it right somehow , but everyday i tried . Whenever i think of you , i know the sun will always keep shining . I never told you why i needed you all the time , because i know you're gonna leave me anytime . I try not to think that you dont longer need me . I cant help it but to try that you will love me . Nothing seems to change from the start , till im with you , everything is different . Everytime i found the words to say , i thought i would make it alright . I could admit my old mistakes , and let everything go . I cared for you everytime , when you told me you're sick , i prayed and told God to fully-recover you as quick as possible . I tried my very best to make you feel better or at least think positive , cheer up your day . I dont want everyday to be a teaful day for both of us . I cant help it but wait . The best for both of our lives is to talk things out and i know you're gonna do whats best for me and i'll do whats best for you . The grass is still green , and im still crying like a baby now . I thought after all this , we could settle in one place and be together for one full day and thats when i know things are alright with us . I thought you wouldn't need me any longer because you have your friends to comfort you and love you . I know you still need me there . But how ? Tell me the best solutions and i will take it because i know thats the best for both of us . Truthfully , i still love you after i said all those things at Msn . I still care for you and your feelings . I know you do care for me after saying it alot of times . I still love you even though you're such a Jerk . I cant bare my eyes to see you leaving me with any other girls , walking away from me . I know things are wayy complicated right now ): Sorry once again . & please dont cry . Like what you've said to me , dont waste your tears on me .
