I just got 2 tight, (& i mean very very tight) slaps from my fucking dad .
Idk why i did wrong .
but i just fucking hate it . The feeling isn't right .
I dont fit in this fucking family . i dont think im needed in this family anymore .
Well , they got better children than me to depend on .
Nobody cares about me right now and ever.
Since that fucking incident which happened years ago , their trust towards me is gone .
i heck care if my parents abandoned me in the streets .
i still have my true friends though , right ?
if dont , i still can live independently . i can live alone .
overall , im still a kid . im still living in the world . Might as well , i live alone .
Nobody wants to listen to whatever im saying , to whatever im having problems with , to whatever im doing to myself , to whatever im getting myself involved to.
I DONT GIVE A FUCKING DAMN !
Now , i just need a veryvery sharp & rusty penknife that will solve everything in my whole fucking miserable life .
Or anything that will make me bleed or anything that make all those miserable and sorrows go away . Im searching for one right now .
Sorry Bby , if i broke my promise to you . Its just that i coudn't take it anymore , seriously .
It really over my limits of patience :'( :'{
All i ever could do now , is hurt myself , bleed myself , or even better kill myself .
There , nobody will ever care/think/bother about me anymore since im always their problem.
Im the one always making them mad/frustrated/angry/furious, might as well , i just myself invisible . Or maybe "menghilangkan diri" , in english is just ran away. Dont let anyone see me ever again .
I just dont fucking like it anymore . It kills me inside when someone just hurts me but they didn't even realise it . or they realise but they just ignore it.
im not making myself better. i wanna be more sick and hurt . I dont give a fucking care .
I feel like runnning away from home again . i just dont feel safe right now and forever .
I just dont feel im a part in this family . They avoid it .
I couldn't stand it anymore .Its going overbroad and it will always be .
If i cant fight over them , might as well , kill them or better kill myself .
It will make their fucking life muchmuchmuchmuch better and earsier .
They could never hear my fucking problems and madness in this fucking house again .
GO AWAY !
FUCK. FUCK. FUCK. FUCK. FUCK. FUCK. FUCK .